My Love Don’t Cost a Thing
It comes a time in everyone's life where you have to say goodbye to someone you love. It is even harder to let go when you cannot identify the root cause of the departure. I am coming on two years of having to have said goodbye to someone whom I felt was my equal and better half. I am allowing myself to be vulnerable and admit this year to myself, the amount of pain and void that was left due to that departure. Last year I was too busy to have to deal with it. I spent most of last year in the air, on vacation, and adapting to my new surroundings. Now, as 2014 is here, I have to face the reality of being single.
I ran across a letter that said, "I know we are still getting to know one another and we will go through our ups and downs, but know that ALL that I want is you, no matter what we go through". My heart twisted,because it was on those words that I held as trust. It was that promise that knew that no matter what we would always remain true. It's funny when you think about because if I ever had to describe myself it would never be an optimist or a pessimist, but a realist. Therefore in having to keep it real with myself, I had to learn that there is a price to be had on this love thing. When people seek to minimize what you are going it really is because they do not have a clue as to the depths of which your spirit was tied to a particular person or thing.
I didn't have any adverse reactions to Valentine's Day because it wasn't one of those Holidays he and I celebrated. However, if I thought about the standing Thursday night dinners, or the daily check-ins on the comings and goings of work, the essential part of what made us true comes to a head. How something could have felt so right, seem to end so fast. I do not know and quite frankly it doesn't even matter. You see it's been two years, and no matter what emotional side of me says or does, it will not change the outcome.
I write these words as a way to let everyone know that it is best to deal with your feelings. Do not become so busy that you do not allow yourself to heal from something meant so much. Avoidance is never the answer to really tackling life's greatest challenges. Matters of the heart are not easily mended and no one situation covers them all. Yet, what you come to find out about yourself is if you take the time to work through the process of healing and overcoming, then the next time someone comes your way, it will not last so long.
Tactful Talk Tuesday with Taneka